I can't believe that it is already Friday. The older I get the faster time flies by, even in my dull life. I can't imagine that it can get any faster than it is now, but since the speed of time's passage is escalating at an exponential rate, I imagine that my last years are going to fly by at jet speed, if not the speed of light. But maybe we draw closer to the light as we age and it has nothing to do with the mathematics of one year's proportion to the whole. Who knows. I just know, time is flying. I have one last dose of antibiotic for Angel which I will give to her the next time she comes by for a hug... I actually have something to talk about today. Wow.
First we kiss |
Next we bat one another. |
and bat some more... |
Then we stare... and go our separate ways.. |
I have never understood the thing people have about not apologizing for anything. It has cost me 2 friends and pain in my life when those I love and trusted after hurting me, have refused to say they were sorry. In two cases where there was profound betrayal, I know that these friends did not set out with malice of fore thought. They did not plan on hurting me. Yet betray my trust they did and hurt me deeply they did. And I could have forgiven each of them, except that they took the hurt to an even deeper level by being unwilling to say they were sorry.... Being sorry would not have meant they had malice. It would have meant that they regretted - regardless of their intent - that they had caused me pain. It is beyond my understanding why that is so difficult for so many people. I always regret hurting another. Even if they have misunderstood my meaning and taken offense at some unintended hurt. I regret that they are hurt. It doesn't mean I was cruel. It doesn't mean I had cruel intent. It means that whatever my intention was, I caused pain and I always regret that. Why would I not?
So that's my thought for the day. I think the fear of apologizing is much the same thing that traps us into anger. We have been taught that anger is a "bad" emotion and that we are not supposed to feel it. Therefore, when we get angry, it must be the other person's "fault," because they have provoked it in us. We don't "blame" people for making us laugh, but making us cranky is often times an unforgivable sin. If we let anger move through us just as we do laughter - as a response to something - neither good nor bad - we would be healthier and happier both. Kitties know how to do that. They are wise indeed.
Some things I'm grateful for today: (Items in red are pre-gratitude, an effort to train myself to believe in abundance and miracles and possibilities - and in my right and worthiness to desire and even HAVE things and maybe even happiness and self worth. It is also a prayer of sorts to the Universe to hear and respond.)
- Angel and Tara Grace
- my home
- my little coffee maker
- Coffee and Int'l Delight
- granola bars
- grapefruit
- water
- my microwave
- my refrigerator
- my kitchen
- my TV
- the remote control
- the mute button
- my computer
- the internet
- electricity
- my Tibetan salt lamps
- my rock collection
- beauty
- the view from my front window
- my warm robes
- my heavy cape
- my furnace
- no more antibiotics!!
- paper towels
- music
- Pandora radio
- my awesome Bose speakers
- the joy of listening
- the joy of singing
- the human voice
- watching Tara play
- watching Angel play
- memory foam
- my chair/walker
- my cane
- that my legs still wobble me around with help
- indoor plumbing
- Crocs
- my grabber
- teddy bears
- computer games
- YouTube
- SKYPE
- Sam-e
- Omega-3
- IP-6
- Vitamin D-3
- Netflix
- lavender
- allspice
- peppermint
- a clothes dryer
- a new Dutch Door front door
- zero balance on my credit cards
- lower interest rates
- paid off mortgage
- Nintendo
- company/companionship
- a sun room on the back of the house
- a reading and healing with Nancy DuTertre
- more flowers/landscaping in the back yard
- freshly painted living and bedroom walls
- a ceiling fan in the bedroom
- winning lottery numbers
- $5,000/week for life from PCH (or a million dollars/year)
- a truckload of money (big bills)
- new curtains
- blinds for the front window
- paying reiki clients
- a party/company for my 65th birthday
- seeing the red list turn to black
- reiki
- angels
- miracles
- Dennis Puffett
- care2.com
- thehungersite.com
- vitacost.com
- the colors of the rainbow
- the ability to read and write
- the ability to type
- the capacity to think and change
- Dr. Bronner soaps
- my friends
- my nieces, my nephew and their families
- that they are happy, healthy and successful
- that they seem to love me as I love them
- Advil
- resilience
- hope
- determination
- possibilities
- words
- completed wordzzles, even badly done ones
- poetry
- poets
- literature
- ideas
- inspiration
- creativity
- the telephone
- talking to friends
- Miracle Foot Repair Cream
- plastic containers
- my mattress
- blankets
- sight
- taste
- touch
- smell
- hearing
- breath
- having a body, even one I'm not to comfortable in
- hope
- love
- laughter
- life
Wishing Us All
the Capacity to Let Life Flow Through Us -
the Good, the not so Good and the Glorious
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