Wednesday, August 01, 2012

Daily Reminder # 707

Well, I hadn't really meant to take a three week (almost) break. Between my transition into legal old age, horrible hot weather, and starting Meals-on-Wheels, I have just been in a kind of inertial funk. Meals-on-Wheels - which is pretty good, by the way - beyond saving me money, is forcing me to shift my schedule to a semi-normal one. I had slipped into staying up until 4:00 am and getting up late. Now I have to be up by 9:30 and both my body and my psyche are fairly irritated by this even though it's a really healthy shift. As for having somebody bring me food every day for a modest price, I am going through a process of letting go of my shame and replacing logical sounding crazy thinking for actual rational thought on the subject. The inner voices that so love to pick on me were having great fun for a while though. You see by there logic, even though I was going deeper and deeper into debt paying for food, I am taking advantage of others because I was ABLE to go deeper and deeper into debt. Something like that. Anyway. The food isn't bad. It's $3/day, 5 days a week so I prepare my own dinner on weekends. Barring some crisis, it should help me chip away at my debt and still eat. I'm going to post lots of pictures because even though it was too hot to sit at the back door most days, I still managed to take a couple of hundred pictures during my absence. Not sure as I type this whether I'll do gratitude. I have let the time slip away and I'm tired and really want to make it to bed at a semi-reasonable hour. I sat here falling asleep at the desk quite a few times over the past few weeks. I HATE that feeling. So... here are some birds and bunnies and chipmunks...  I think that maybe something happened to my little buddy Scarface the Greedy. I haven't seen him. Vanessa still comes most days. 

 Not sure what his bird was doing, but I thought it was
interesting. Not sure what kind of bird it is. Maybe that
same cowbird from before, just a little older.  ??? 

Too many pictures, I know.... It has been an odd year of drab (no offense to the sparrows) birds, so it was nice that the blue jay visited at least once.

Just an abbreviated gratitude list tonight. I'm grateful for so many things. My new system is to say thank you instead of I'm grateful for. I mention that to remind myself.  Anyway.... Thank you for the bed I'm going to climb into shortly. Thank you for my alarm clock. Thank you that the litter box is changed and the garbage out. Thank you for the garbage man and his extra steps every week. Thank you for meals on wheels, for food to eat, for my home and electricity, for my Tibetan salt lamps. Thank you, of course for Angel and Tara Grace. Thank you for my back yard and the wonderful birds and beasties who visit the deck (which is I noticed is collapsing...) Thank you for my computer and the internet and computer games. Thank you for Dr. Jim and my nieces and my nephew and my great niece and nephew. Thank you for my camera and for Advil (which I really need at the moment). Thank you for beauty and too many things to list at the moment. Thank you for anyone who visits this blog. Thank you for love and laughter and life.


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