Wednesday, January 07, 2009

Curmudgeon Stuff: I Hate Awards

There are so many really important things I could write about today. I could write about world peace and the insanity being perpetrated by both sides in Gaza. I could write about political ambition over common sense and the nonsense that still seems to be rampant in my government. I could write about... well lots of things. But instead I have decided to grumble a bit.

I kind of hesitate to write what I'm about to say. It seems ungracious, though I don't mean it to be ungracious. I am always thrilled when anybody visits my little blog, especially when you say nice things to me. I thrive on kind words. I post something and I wait eagerly for someone to comment. Thank you to each and every person who has ever commented here.

Ok... here comes the curmudgeon part. I also appreciate the thought behind awards. But I hate awards. I really hate them. Give me a good comment any day but please don't ever give me an award, even a wonderful, beautiful one. I hate them. Even when they are pretty. Even when I love the sentiment behind them. I just hate them. To me they are like those gooey emails that I'm supposed to pass along to ten or twenty people. I hate those too, even when they are clever and beautiful. I especially hate the ones that say if I'm really your friend I'll send it back to you. If you were really my friend you wouldn't ask. (That's my inner curmudgeon speaking. I know that people send things on for many reasons and true friends have sent me those emails and I still love them just as much even though I HATE the emails.) But back to awards. They feel a lot like those emails to me. I feel very mean spirited saying this. I mean how ungracious can I be? But I can't help it. I've tried to hint about it... what I've said in the past is true - getting awards freaks me out and I do have a hard time receiving them above and beyond the fact that I just HATE them. I think I kind of hate awards in general. I seldom watch things like the Academy awards except maybe to see movie clips. I'm no opposed to praise and compliments. Praise and compliments are cool. I guess I'm not opposed to awards exactly... for anybody who likes getting them. For myself, though, I feel more like I'm being punished than giving a gift. For that reason, I guess, I don't much like giving them either. (How curmudgeony is THAT!?) I love praising people. I love giving gifts, but I really hate giving awards. I mean, how meaningful is it if I'm required by it's rules to give it to x number of other people? How sincere is the passing along? And I know that's an unfair question. On those occasions when I've passed awards along, I've passed them to people I truly and sincerely admire. So anyway, please don't ever give me an award again even if you think I'm wonderful and deserving.... because... need I repeat it again.... I really, really, really hate awards. What a mean-spirited, grouchy old curmudgeon I am!

I was going to add a second part to this - not curmudgeony really but something that I want to talk about. I think I'll wait and make it a separate post tomorrow. Meanwhile, here are some pictures to hopefully atone for my bad manners posting this. I really do appreciate the thought behind those of you who have given me awards but I just hate awards. I'm sorry. I just do.


Carol said...

I just arrived off of Nick's blog. Thank you for writing this about awards. I hate them, too - and for all of the reasons that you wrote.

They give me a stomach ache...

Susan said...

Lovely photos. My favourite is the top one!

MaR said...

Well said, Raven!!! Me too, give me comments, don't give me awards!!

Lovely shots, particulary the feline ones :)

Terry said...

Gee Raven, I thought that I was the only grouch about forwards!
I always say that it is so easy to send thousands of these things out with the touch of one button!
How personal is THAT?
I have sent very few forwards in my life time and if by chance I do, I always write a letter with it and I only send it to one or two people, each with their own personal letter!
That's the only way to go!
I love cats and I adore squirrels[the little monsters!!]
About awards, I have received very few and I never have had too much luck in choosing six people to send them to, so I have not.
I love all of my blogging friends and how could I choose only six?
Have a rest of the day a happy one dear Raven! Just forget about the awards that you probably really deserved and forget about the forwards and enjoy all of your comments because you are surely loved!...........Love Terry

San said...

Raven, you have an award over at my place. The CUTE CURMUDGEON award.

Just kidding.

Lu' said...

Raven getting the award is nice as you say, but I wont pass them along. I hate chain letter and chain emails and the awards must pass along is the same.

The first pic is fantastic, wow.

Melli said...

ROFL! I totally agree with you! I hate them too! Most of them mean nothing ... from the giver or to the receiver. Most of them have absolutely nothing to do with who I am or what's on my blog! And most people turn around and give them to every bloomin person they read! Or ... I love this - "if you READ my blod, you deserve this award - take it!" OY VEY! Comments ARE the reward! That's all I need! Well done!

Carletta said...

Somebody needed to say it! At first I was ok with them but I got one yesterday from someone I hardly know.
I love your blog - is that good!!! :)
The kitty pics are great.
San left a great comment. :)

We got a little snow today and right now the wind is howling.

Anonymous said...

Yay, Raven! You're my hero. I want your "I Hate Awards" award! I was so thrilled when I received my very first award -- then I realized the person who gifted me with it gave the same award to 14 other bloggers, who gave it to 15 other bloggers, who gave it to .....

So, on my computer desktop I have a folder with dozens of awards in it. They are not on my blog and never will be. I did put some on my old blog if the giver complained about my ignoring their award, but no more. Now I just say "thank you" and tuck them away.

Every comment is a reward more precious than any photoshopped stamp ever could be.

JunieRose2005 said...


I 'sort of' feel the same as you about awards- and I CERTAINLY DO about email forwards. You just feel so obligated to follow through- especially if it's from someone you really like! LOL- Truth is I don't HAVE high numbers of friends or relatives I feel like sending stuff on to!

(I don't feel quite as strongly about awards- perhaps because it's newer for me!)

Also-some of the good things that come around through Emails, sounds you are someone very special in this person's life...UNTIL you see the number of other people the email was sent to! THAT takes away any feelings of sincerity from the sender of the message! lol- well- that's my opinion!

I much prefer a personal email from family and friends. I'm always thrilled to get real updates of ppl I care about.

I also appreciate interesting links to things- just not those mass mailings that go out to everyone !

Thanks for being brave enough to put all these thoughts together!


Dianne said...

are you reading my mind!

the time between my mammouth award posts keeps getting longer and longer because I don't know how to pass them on anymore

and the ones with a meme attached to them and 17 rules asking you to link to 3 places!! Oy Vey

I visit every participant in every project I am part of (I refuse to use the word meme - it makes me sick) I answer all my comments, I try to remember important days for my regular readers - that is the stuff that's important

I'll never forget when I first started blogging I thought awards were like gifts - so I made one and sent it to a couple of people - as a gift, not an award. only 1 person got the sentiment, the rest were baffled since it was called a gift not an award. hurt my feelings a bit actually - then, now it's just funny and silly

I understand wanting to acknowledge each other but I always recommend blogs and I link to people and I talk people up - isn't that more rewarding? it is to me

every time I visit Maithri and see people there who found him thru me I feel so good - for all of us.

I think you just started a revolution!

Love ya!

Did you see the clip of Kuccinich on Jay S's blog? Are you going to post it? Link it?

God I adore Dennis! and Jay

Travis Cody said...

I think I understand what you mean. I stopped posting them and passing them on awhile ago.

I always thank the person who gave them to me, but that's all I want to do. I hope people understand.

Anonymous said...

Ok, no awards for you, I don't give awards anyway ;-) Very cute squirrel ! I wished I had one in my garden. Tell your cat not to eat him !

Jeff B said...

I'll echo what many of the others have already said. The comments are award enough for me too.

Some that are truly given out of care are ok, but the ones passed on out of obligation are senseless.

Linda Murphy said...

This is a very honest and great post and my sentiments exactly-glad you said it! I especially despise the forwarded emails where I will get good luck or if I truly love someone-I'll send this or I can expect a miracle within seven days.

Now, I do enjoy the memes, but I only share them with the pals who also enjoy them or on my blog once and awhile.

Hope all is well for you. The little squirrel here is very sweet!

Felisol said...

Dear Raven,
the awards are an American thing, a product of schools with honor rolls and film magnates distributing Oscars.
The ones giving you awards have done it of a honest heart and with utterly good intentions.
Can you hate such people?
Or such an act?

There are so many evil deeds and cunning wrongdoers; child molesters, drug dealers, corrupt politicians and police, the list is endless.

I think we can abstain from hating people who we know do utterly good. Hate brings nothing good and has no life in it.
Even if an award is presented to numerous; so is the Oscar, there's no reason at all to feel offended. (I'm always thinking of Snoopy lying on his roof, listening to the radio."There are now 31,64351 beagles in the world." "Good grief, I'm not unique," Snoopy sighs.)

Axel Sandemose was an author who fled from Denmark via Canada to Norway. He felt chocked by the conformity press in his little hometown.
The same conformity press alos is alive and kicking in Norway, even though Sandemose did his best to lit a counter fire writing down The Law Of Jante.
“Jante Law.” The original law consists of a list of ten social mores in a fictional small Danish town:

1. You shall not think that you are special.
2. You shall not think that you are of the same standing as us.
3. You shall not think that you are smarter than us.
4. Don’t fancy yourself as being better than us.
5. You shall not think that you know more than us.
6. You shall not think that you are more important than us.
7. You shall not think that you are good at anything.
8. You shall not laugh at us.
9. You shall not think that anyone cares about you.
10. You shall not think that you can teach us anything

I assure you, there are not many
awards of any kind neither in Norwegian blogs or in public life.
Be a proud American.
From Felisol

Raven said...

Dear Felisol -

My mother must have studied Jante Law. It's how she raised me.

I don't hate the PEOPLE who give awards. I hope it doesn't sound like I do. I appreciate the intent and the people, I just hate the awards themselves. I don't think they have much meaning in the end. Sometimes they do, but mostly people pass them on because that's the rule and they have to - much like the emails that I get over and over and over.

I am proud to be an American and a citizen of the world.

Felisol said...

Dear Raven
Oh, you are so special and much richer gifted than any human beings I know from anywhere..
Children are defenseless against unwise upbringing.
As adults we get the chance to fight back.
I guess I was lucky in my choice of parents. They mostly let be remain the wildflower I was created to be.
My Dad had a genuine talent for love; he lifted both my Mom and me to a higher level.
Thanks for caring about me during my time of flue.
From Felisol

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