Sunday, August 01, 2010

Daily Reminder # 63

The Bible says that "The love of money is the root of all evil," though I found a translation that is probably more accurate - or at least that I find it easier to agree with. This site claims that a more accurate translation is that "the love of money is the root of ALL KINDS of evil." That seems much more sensible. Maybe this is rationalization on my part, because I really love money. I'd like to have a whole lot more of it than I do. Really. I'm waiting for Publisher's Clearinghouse to stop giving my ten million to other people. I think money is wonderful and can be great fun to have; it can be used to do great good.

BUT... the consuming, self-absorbed, totally amoral quest for money that led to the recent financial collapse in this country and elsewhere truly is evil. That kind of greed baffles me. People who will sell their souls and the well-being of millions of other people for a big profit that they can't possible spend in their life-times is both obscene and evil.

What prompted me to write about this today is something that has been bugging me since I watched Michael Moore's Capitolism: A Love Story. One of the things he talks about in the movie is a practice by many big corporations - places like Walmart, AT&T to name just two big ones - of buying life insurance on their employees. This isn't insurance FOR the employee or his/her family. It is insurance so that if you kick the bucket while working for them, they make a million dollars or three million or five million. How obscene is that? And you know what it's called? Dead Peasant insurance. That's evil. Creepy and evil.

But back to the love of money. I was raised to feel guilty about having anything, about wanting anything. My mother, who had grown up desperately poor, resented th fact that her children - at least this one - had as much as we did. As a consequence, purchasing anything for myself is often a struggle between desire, shame, guilt and common sense. For a long time, if I got something for myself, I felt compelled to buy something for my friends... and if I couldn't or didn't, I felt guilty. When I bought my first TV, my first stereo (that tells you how old I am), I felt like I had committed a crime. I still struggle with this. Since I am poor, living on disability, getting food stamps, do I have a right to buy myself a book? Did I have a right to buy myself my birthday lamps? Who do I think I am? If I get a package from UPS, I project jealousy and anger onto the neighbors. It's insane. I'm not as bad as I used to be, but I still struggle with it.

Despite the fact that I believe it's an abundant Universe and we are meant - every one of us - to share in its bounty. I love the Abraham Hicks teachings. They are wise and gentle and practical and loving. I highly recommend their book ASK AND IT IS GIVEN. Last year, after Delaware Opportunities finished lavishing the wonder of a new bathroom, kitchen and front ramp on me, I found a piece of paper with an exercise from that book. I had done the exercise and forgotten about it. Of 15 things I had written down, I think 10 had come to pass. Not bad.

I'm way better at receiving than I used to be.

Why would God create such a beautiful abundant world, if he didn't want those of us who live in it to share it and be happy and healthy. I truly believe that there is enough in this world for everyone to have abundance. That's what I wish for us. Not the have and have-not world we are currently living in, not the I get a hundred million at the expense of starving families world. Our species really is better than that. At least we have it in us to be better than that. We just have to remember who we really are.

I guess that's it for me. It's late and I'm not going to read over what I've written, just post it and hope it makes some sense. The subject of money still freaks me out. But I declare here that whatever the Bible says, I, Katherine (aka Raven) LOVE money. I wish we all had tons of it and shared it joyfully with one another. What a grand and glorious world it would be if we did.

Some things I'm grateful for today:
  • visiting kitties and woodchucks
  • money to pay my bills
  • bananas
  • more cool weather
  • movies
  • International Delight



Argent said...

Ooh, this post resonates strongly with me. We weren't exactly poor as kids but we were of limited means, shall we say. I also used to attend a very fundamentalist Christian church where we were all basically sinners and not worth anything in ourselves. Consequently, I get the guilts big-time for just thinking about buying something 'frivolous' like a new computer or similar gadget. I can afford it, but should I be 'wasting' money on it? This is what goes through my head. If I do buy the thing, whatever it is, I then feel a bit guilty for having it. It's a tough one to get over. Glad to see I'm not alone.

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