I have had a break-through of sorts, I think. Re-listened to the last two Healing with the Masters interviews and recognized what has probably always been obvious but was also news on some deeper level of my psyche. Anyway, intuitive life coach Christie May Sheldon was talking about how most of us pick up our blocks to success and abundance etc. before the age of 7. She then did a kind of meditation thing where we cleared (or tried to clear) some of these blocks. Anyway, somewhere in the process, I realized that a big part of what I took away from the crazy my mother poured into me from the time I was about 2 was not just that I was wicked for wanting things - that's old news. The revelation today was that the other thing I took from being her therapist was that I could either want things, be my natural joyful self or I could try to win her love. I could not do both. This was reinforced by my brother's hatred of any attention I received, but I don't think I really consciously realized before that it was such a primal choice. I don't think I have the words of it quite right yet, but if I can really grasp it, I think it contains the seed of a profound spiritual and emotional shift. I hope so anyway. Certainly there is much food for thought to chew on.
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| Dirty windows and an awkward angle make this not a very good picture, but on the other hand, I just love the prayer hands pose, so... |
Some things I'm grateful for today: (Items in red are pre-gratitude, an attempt to embrace the idea - and maybe even the reality - of abundance and to align with the Creaitve Forces of the Universe in hopes of becoming the kind of buddy on whom they wish to lavish happiness and cash and other good things.)
- Angel and Tara Grace
- coffee and Int'l Delight
- pancakes
- water
- Dr. Jim
- Healing with the Master
- new understandings
- good meditations
- my nieces, my nephew and their families
- that they are happy, healthy and successful
- my friends
- my neighbors
- my computer
- the internet
- computer games
- SKYPE
- YouTube
- Pandora Radio
- music
- the joy of listening
- the joy of singing
- the human voice
- my awesome Bose speakers
- Netflix
- sight
- hearing
- taste
- touch
- smell
- lavender
- allspice
- white sage
- paper towels
- indoor plumbing
- Dr. Bronner soaps
- Dr. Ihhiru probiotic soap
- coconut oil
- Sam-e
- Omega-3
- IP-6
- Vitamin D-3
- a safe, economical way to install my dryer
- a new (Dutch) front door
- lower interest rates
- zero balance on my credit cards
- a paid off mortgage
- more flowers/landscaping for the back yard
- a sun room on the back of the house
- a reading and healing with Nancy DuTertre
- company/companionship
- Nintendo
- new curtains
- blinds for the front window
- freshly painted living and bedroom walls
- $5,000/week for life from PCH or a million a year or some other large sum of money
- more paying reiki clients
- a gathering of the people I love for my 65th birthday in July
- winning lottery numbers
- a ceiling fan in the bedroom
- a mattress for the guest bedroom
- a truckload of money (big bills)
- clean windows
- one or more whistling vessel gatherings
- seeing the red list turn to black
- reiki
- angels
- miracles
- Dennis Puffett
- Healing with the Masters
- my cane
- my chair/walker
- that my legs still wobble me around with help
- open windows
- ceiling fans
- words
- poetry
- literature
- the ability to read and write
- the ability to type
- Jon Stewart
- Stephen Colbert
- Comedy Central
- the Sci-Fi Channel
- imagination
- ideas
- inspiration
- breath
- Crocs
- my giant TV that Nate and Dan gave me
- the remote control
- the mute button
- the view from my front window
- chipmunks, sparrows and doves
- flowers
- hummingbirds (except that they are usually too fast to photograph)
- my mattress
- electricity
- my Tibetan salt lamps
- my rock collection
- the colors of the rainbow
- beauty
- tingshas
- creativity
- resilience
- determination
- possibilities
- hope
- kitty hugs
- love
- laughter
- life
I Wish You Self Love and Inner Peace
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