Week 115! Hard to believe I've done this 115 times. Wasn't sure I was going to come up with anything this week. Anybody want to volunteer some words? I think I'm looking at what we have to work with this week and thinking maybe it's time for a sane person to come up with a list.
The words for week's ten word challenge were: ear phones, sleeping, honest to goodness, lawn mower, cinnamon, matches, antibiotics, congregation, flower pot, cheese and for the mini: eeeeek a mouse!, span, spurn, choose me, geese
The mega:
I really love cinnamon - it's supposed to be better for your health than antibiotics - so I bought myself a flower pot, thinking maybe I'd grow my own, only to find out that it grows on trees and not in pots. Nothing seems to be going right lately. I went to one of those websites that matches people up and I see that there's a profile for this guy in my congregation who I've had sort of a crush on. Honest to goodness, he's perfect for me, but he seems to spurn my attention no matter what I try. It doesn't help that all the women chase after him like a flock of geese... and smile at him like someone has told us to say "cheese," but to no avail. "Choose me, choose me," we all whisper but he doesn't seem to be choosing any of us. So, anyway, on this website it says that he's into gardening and landscaping, so I think, "that's it!" I'll hire him to fix my yard. So I bought a new lawn mower and some garden supplies and I put up a sign at church saying I'm looking for help. Over the span of the next week, I have to tell 5 of the creepiest men in the congregation that the job is filled before he finally calls and I hire him. So first he arrives so early in the morning that I'm still sleeping and I look like... well I look awful... and I feel humiliated even though he doesn't seem to even notice. But I try to salvage things and I go in and get myself all spiffed up and then - I know it was lame - I go near the kitchen door and scream "Eeeeek a mouse," as loud as I can.... Trouble is he's wearing ear phones and running the lawn mower so he doesn't hear me. But of course the big creep next door does hear me and he comes running over to help out. What a disaster.
Mini:
Like a gaggle of geese
They give me no peace
It is my intention
To spurn their attentions
The ladies who ogle me so
Don't they think I know?
Choose me they mutter
Eyes a flutter
Why can't they see
To what degree
It is not to ladies I am drawn
Despite my rather macho brawn
Sometimes I truly think I'm cursed
And this week really was the worst
One even lured me to her house
And then tried screaming "eeeeek as mouse,"
Luckily her neighbor Nick
Spanned distance double quick
Rescuing her hapless prey
To run from her another day.
The 10-word:
Honest to goodness, some days you just when you think you can't win, something wonderful happens. So this morning, the altar committee from the congregation had finally left after a long, tedious discussion of flower pots vs vases and the virtue of matches over lighters (really... we debate these things). The antibiotics* had kicked in and the baby was sleeping for the first time in a over a week. I had curled up in my favorite chair, ear phones wrapping me in peaceful music, a nice plate of cream cheese and cinnamon crackers and the first feeling of peace I'd had in what seemed like forever.... So of course Fred, across the street, had to choose that moment to run his stupid lawn mower. I swear he's got a jet engine in it. Anyway, I spilled my coffee, the baby woke up and I'm sorry to say I had some very un-Christian thoughts. I know it wasn't his fault. He's actually a very kind man and mows our yard too just because he loves riding around on that silly machine. It's just that I was so very tired. His wife - who is kindness itself and seems to have a kind of intuitive radar - knocked on the door - and within seconds, the jet was put back in its hangar, she had hustled me back to my music, taken the baby out of my arms and rocked her back to sleep and then quietly tip-toed out with a smile and a wave. I love that woman. I think I will ask her to adopt me legally so I can call her Mom.
* I hated to use antibiotics with the baby but I couldn't think of another way to get rid of it. I think we take way too many drugs and we start them too early. Not good for us. Just had to add that.
**********
Words for next week's 10-word challenge are: easy come easy go, charcoal, flute, sugar plum, signs, side effects, gymnastics, operation, credit card, wings
And for the mini: operation, hair, brick wall, flamingo, porch
Thank you for playing! Newcomers can check here for some guidelines (and they are only guidelines, not rules) to make the process more fun.
Enjoy! See you next week!
Don't forget to add
your name to Mr. Linky!
5 comments:
I loved your first two interlinked pieces - reading the second one really made me smile. And who wouldn't want a nice neighbour lady like that? I wish she'd adopt me too. I will email you some words - not fair you shoudl always have the burden of choosing. My mini's done but I need to write up Harold. I'll be back!
The first two pieces made me laugh out loud - that poor bedeviled man LOL. I want a neighbor to adopt me!
Hmmm, and I just swallowed a codeine tablet -- of course, the doc just sliced and diced my nipple today.
I have to agree the first one is very funny
I'm up now - at last!
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